Day thirty-four...

Today is going well, masha'Allah. I'm eating better but still don't have a desire for alot of food... this is fantastic! I'm just having a lazy Saturday at home with hubby and the kids... its really nice not to be rushing around town all day. Well, not much to update today, insha'Allah I'll post later.
I'm still hangin' in there, masha'Allah!

Finally a 'real' milkshake...

Well, I am happy... no... delighted to inform you that I finally had a real milkshake. Yeah, not slimfast, an actual shake made with real ice cream. It was fantastic... Masha'Allah!!!
Hubby took me out tonight and I got a milkshake before dinner... yeah, I'm an adult so I can do that right :) Then we got a pizza to share, Philly Cheese Steak from Dominos... remember it is my break night. Well, I'm still not really feelin' like eating much so I couldn't put down more than one piece. That is okay with me. Never thought I would enjoy my break so much... even without eating much. It was just nice to have something different. 
So... today I did well, masha'Allah. Another day of success. May Allah bless me with many more...ahmeen.

Day thirty-three...

Masha'Allah, I'm really starting to see some results now. I still don't have much of an appetite today, but once again I must say Alhamdulillah for that!!! I'm going out with my hubby tonight... I'm not feeling too hungry though. Maybe we will share something... I know I can't eat a whole plate of anything. I will update with the details later, insha'Allah.
Oh yeah... today someone actually told me that I'm getting skinny...someone that I haven't seen in a while. That really made me feel good, masha'Allah! Still a long road ahead though...can't lose sight of things. May Allah make it easier for me and give me greater results...ahmeen.

Day thirty-two...

It's pretty cool that I've made it to day 32! I'm pleased with my progress, however, I know that I have a very long road ahead and I don't want to relax yet. I haven't felt much like food today either. That is nice, masha'Allah. I did eat a bit though, but not really even enough to list. I did enjoy my shake for breakfast though, masha'Allah. I should really get a multi-vitamin in me though... gotta put that on my 'to do' list, insha'Allah. Well, not much to report today.... see yah :)

Day thirty-one...

Today is going well, masha'Allah... as far as my eating is concerned. I don't really have much of an appetite these days though. I don't really know why... just don't. Hey, I'm not complaining... I will enjoy not having the urge to clean out the kitchen any time I can get it. As far as I'm concerned this is really a blessing, masha'Allah! I'm pretty exhausted today though... I am really looking forward to getting the kids in the bed so that I can enjoy some 'me' time, insha'Allah. I will update later, insha'Allah.

Day thirty... Amazing...

Masha'Allah, there were many times I felt like giving up this month... completely by the Mercy of Allah alone I was able to make it this far. Alhamdulillah, I now am really starting to actually see a difference. This is alot of encouragement for me. I've gotta keep it up though and not get too comfy... I have in the past gotten lazy right after seeing some results. I don't wanna be that person anymore. It hasn't been easy and I am learning alot about myself in the process. I am learning to not think about food all the time... which is probably the biggest accomplishment so far... but I'm not quite finished with it. It keeps popping back every now and then. I had a shake for breakfast and not much of anything for lunch and then a very small dinner and now I am pleased with the fact that I resisted my urge to grab something unhealthy for a snack. I opted for a skimmed milk, no sugar strawberry milk shake ( remember I don't use ice cream), and a cup of tea. I've also been doing well with my water intake, masha'Allah. I am pleased but my struggle is far from over... I've gotta take my feelings now and hold onto them to help me push through the next month, insha'Allah. May Allah make it easy for me and continue to bless me with visible results...ahmeen.

Just one of those days...

I'm really sorry I didn't post yesterday... it really was just one of those days. I did great with my plan though. Actually I didn't feel like eating all day so I had two shakes, without snacks and I forced myself to eat dinner. I don't know why, just one of those days. 

Today is day twenty-nine...already. I can't help but feel happy to have stuck with it this long. I pray that Allah makes it easy for me to continue far beyond this day...ahmeen. I will update later, insha'Allah

Day twenty-seven...

Masha'Allah, I can hardly believe that it is already day twenty-seven. I've been working hard and struggling hard too. I am starting to feel and see a difference, and I still know that I have got a long way to go. Insha'Allah I will hang in there and continue to transform myself from thick2thin. 
Today is going great... so far, may Allah give me the will power to withstand cravings and prevent me from nibbling...ahmeen. I will update later, insha'Allah.

Mixed emotions...

Today I let myself enjoy a few treats, as a break. I have earned it but still felt a bit a guilt after consuming it. I don't know why I am so emotional about things sometimes. I just feel like I'm never gonna not be addicted to food. That scares me. I get a handle on it for a while and I always have to worry about when I will slip up. I guess I should just remember that each day is a chance to succeed and continue to push through all of the emotions and achieve thinness for the first time in my life. I can do it...insha'Allah.

oops... its didn't go through...

I tried to post yesterday, the internet was acting up so it didn't go through. I had a horrible migraine though. I was pretty much out of it then anyway. Masha'Allah I am feeling better today... Im just exahausted!!! My eating has been going really well, masha'Allah. I will update more later, insha'Allah.
Day 25 gone now I'm on day 26...wow, masha'Allah!

Day twenty-four complete...

Whew... today has really been busy. I am thankful to be here now and actually having a moment to post. It's very late and I should be sleeping, but here I am, keeping true to my commitment to post daily. I have done great today with my plan, masha'Allah. I ate a small breakfast, a light snack, had my shake for lunch, ate another light snack then a nice dinner. I did well, except... because I was so busy I did neglect some of my water intake. I know that I got at least half in though. I wasn't expecting to be out of the house for so long, so I didn't take my bottle on the road. Still, I think I did great today, masha'Allah. I am seeing a bit of improvement with the way that my clothes are fitting but still I don't see much change in my appearance. Although hubby says he sees it, masha'Allah :) I guess that is important huh???  :) Well, since its been such a long day, I will get off of this laptop and head off to dream land, insha'Allah.

May Allah bless me with success...ahmeen!

Feelin' a bit better...

Well, I'm feelin' a bit better now, but still having some discomfort. I did well with my plan today, masha'Allah. I had a nice hot cup of tea to help me feel better, masha'Allah it did help a bit. I had an apple for my night-time snack, that was nice too. I hope that tomorrow I will be feeling 100%, insha'Allah.
Day twenty-three is over...masha'Allah!

blah...

Yeah, thats right... I feel blah today. I just have this knot in my throat and it doesn't seem to want to go away. I was sooo hungry earlier. I ate but its just sitting in my throat. I don't know what to do. I just feel weird. I want to have a shake, but I'm worried it will not go down well. We'll see, insha'Allah. I'll update later, insha'Alah...

My snacks today...

 

1/2 a grill cheese with some dried fruit... yum, yum!

Day twenty-two...

Today is going great, masha'Allah. I really don't wanna mess it up. I had a shake for breakfast and successfully resisted my urge to nibble, masha'Allah. I drank lots of water (which had me going to the bathroom many times). I had mixed salad from the restaurant for my snack with a small bit of bread, and a diet pepsi. I am pleased with my progress today, insha'Allah I will be strong enough to withstand my desires to nibble on pointless stuff. I'm a bit nervous... I plan to head to the kitchen in a bit to cook lunch for the family. I plan on making french fries... that is one of my weaknesses... May Allah, the Most High protect me from slipping up and losing control of myself...ahmeen. I will update later... make dua'a for me.

Sigh...

I'm feelin' pretty down tonight. It seems that everyday I stumble at some point. I just wish it were easier to stay on my plan without being tempted or without slipping up somehow. I hate it when I am doing really well and then I succumb to a stupid urge and mess things up. Oh well, I am human, and mistakes are what we do... right??? Well, tomorrow is yet another day... another day to attempt to do this right, without mistakes... it's possible... I have done it before and insha'Allah, by the Mercy of Allah alone, I will do it again. I've just gotta analyze my day and try not to fall into the same mistakes again. Anyone know any creative ways to prevent nibbling??? Is anyone out there reading???

Yay!!!

The chocolate shake was great, masha'Allah!!! I really enjoyed that, I drank my shake while cooking french fries for my kids... I usually nibble while I cook so I might eat like a half a plate of fries before I finish cooking them all. I was happy to sip my shake instead. I bought straws to use when I drink my shakes. I know, I'm such a little kid... still, I really enjoyed drinking my chocolate shake with my straws... :)
Yay... its day twenty-one... That is an accomplishment for me, masha'Allah! I am looking much healthier and I can tell I'm melting. I am staying true to my plan and its working. I had a light breakfast and showed good self-control, masha'Allah. I drank some moca with whipped cream for a snack with my hubby, and I drank my yummy chocolate shake for lunch. I just had a nice salad for a snack and I wonder what I will have for dinner??? I'll update later, insha'Allah.

Day twenty...

Alhamdulillah!!! Day twenty, that is amazing! Here I am after returning from grocery shopping happy... I finally got the chocolate slim-fast. I am excited to try it tomorrow, insha'Allah. Today I have done well, masha'Allah. I had a very light breakfast, which is funny because I ate the same as yesterday yet I was satisfied, masha'Allah. I then had the rest of my dessert from last night for a snack. I ate a hotdog for lunch (we were out of milk, therefore, I couldn't make a shake), and I am anxious for dinner. My in-laws are coming for dinner tonight, and my mother-in-law is a wonderful cook and she is bringing the food, masha'Allah, may Allah reward her greatly...ahmeen. They will be here soon. I just thought I could squeeze in a quick blog post, insha'Allah. Well, I will update soon insha'Allah. Keep making dua'a for me... I sure need it.

yum,yum...

Masha'Allah, everything was delicious! We went to Majles here are some pics of my meal... 

 

I was so happy when I couldn't finish...

  

We also went for dessert, which I am pleased to report, I also couldn't finish that!!! That is amazing progress for me, Masha'Allah!

Truly the praise is only for Allah, the Lord of the worlds and all that exists! 

Day nineteen...

I can't believe that I have made it nineteen days already... that truly is an accomplishment, masha'Allah! Well, tonight is my big night out with my hubby, I'm really excited and really hungry. I don't know why but today I have been very hungry. I had a very light breakfast, which I soon realized was not enough. I counted my calories and decided to go ahead with my slim fast shake. Alhamdulillah, after that I was able to go much longer without feeling hungry. I ate a light lunch and am eagerly awaiting my night out. May Allah bless me with success, and give me an enjoyable evening...ahmeen.

Baby steps...

Today I have gotta keep reminding myself that I need to take baby steps to reach my goal. I can't beat myself up every time I falter. My hubby didn't bring home what I expected. Yeah, there was some salad, and that was yummy, but not the kind I expected. He got pizza and a mixed salad from our favorite sharwarma restaurant. I had one and a half slices of veggie pizza and some hummus, tabbouleh, baba ghanoush, olive salad, and muttabal (maybe like a spoon of each from the mixed salad platter). I kinda felt like I let myself down, but then I took it in stride and focused on the fact that before I would have eaten three or four slices of the pizza and had dessert too. So I choose to look at the improvement. 
My visit to my friends house was very nice, masha'Allah. I was pleased with my portion control for the dinner portion of the evening. I chose to use the smaller dessert plate for my dinner. I didn't overfill it either. After eating, I realized that I wanted a bit more so I went back a second time. I didn't feel bad about this because I had used portion control and knew that I was still on track. Everything was going great until I kinda lost my mind a bit when the fresh, hot, basbousa was served along side a beautiful chocolate cake with whipped icing and chocolate shavings and cherries. I over filled my plate... Alhamdulillah, I caught myself and fed at least half of the plate to my ever-hungry kids. I did have a bit of a relapse at the dessert table, but I am pleased to say that I will pick myself up and continue. Tomorrow is another day and it will present its own set of temptations and trials. I can't give up every time I falter. I have still earned my dinner out with my hubby. I didn't give up this week and that is an accomplishment. 
This is me... struggling with my inner-self to transform myself from thick to thin... nobody said it would be perfect. Nothing is perfect, except for Allah, the Most High.

Day eighteen...

Today has already been a bit of a trial. Hubby is picking up fast food for the family for lunch... I truly wanted to tell him to grab me a big extra value(extra fat) meal, Alhamdulillah, I resisted and instead requested a salad. That was super hard, especially since I really wanted to say yes. I know that I will feel better having not given in to my temptations. We are planning a night out at a friends house tonight. I plan to enjoy myself on a moderate level, insha'Allah. That means not over doing it too much and I will allow myself some dessert...maybe :) But, in order to earn this enjoyment, I've gotta stick to my plan until tonight. I can't really afford to overdo it too much... tomorrow is Friday, my night out with hubby, and I've been looking forward to that for two weeks. May Allah make me strong against my desires...ahmeen.

Whats to eat???

Today is going well, Alhamdulillah! I've been a bit hungrier than usual for some reason, but that will pass soon, insha'Allah. I have been following the plan well, masha'Allah. I am exhausted today, I woke up with a headache and have been dealing with it ever since. I took meds and that really helped, still its annoying. I am looking forward to my snack though.... wonder what I will have???

 

my dinner :)

Day sixteen...

Today is actually almost over, masha'Allah. I was too busy today to post earlier. I did well today, I followed my plan and it was nice...except... ( I really hate it when I have to say that) I skipped a snack and was really hungry at dinner and the food was so yummy that I ate a bit more than I would have liked. It wasn't that big of an error. Insha'Allah tomorrow I will not make the same mistakes. I had a nice snack a bit ago and now I'm just drinking the rest of my water before bed. I am starting to see a difference in my clothes, this is great! I tend to fall off of plans after I see results, I don't know why. Maybe because I get comfortable. I don't want for that to happen this time, insha'Allah. May Allah keep me steadfast upon what is right and good for me, with my weight loss and in everything in this life...ahmeen.

Day Fifteen...

Masha'Allah, today is going wonderfully! I had a light breakfast and latte with whipped cream for my snack. I just drank my slim fast shake for lunch, and I have already prepared a salad for a snack later. I'm doing good, masha'Allah. I am preparing to go out for a walk in a bit, that should be nice, insha'Allah. I'm overly anxious to see results but the truth is that I'm getting healthier and I'm sure that the weight will come off, insha'Allah. It will not happen overnight, so I shouldn't expect that to happen. Patience has never been one of my strong points... gotta work on that, insha'Allah. Although, I did notice that some of my clothes are fitting better, masha'Allah. May Allah continue to bless me with results and bless me with complete success in this life and in the hereafter....ahmeen. I'll update later, insha'Allah...
Im still trying to figure out what to cook for dinner....

Making changes...

Well, today is coming to an end and I must say that I'm pleased with how I did today, Alhamdulillah. I've learned alot over the last fourteen days, masha'Allah. One thing that I learned is that liquid diets are good for a kick start but aren't meant to be a way of life. At some point you have gotta overcome the addiction to food. You can't just run from it. You've actually got to teach yourself to eat less, to not think about eating, to just remember that food is just for nourishment and not a habit. I am struggling with my addiction but insha'Allah, there is progress being made and insha'Allah I will find the thin me within...
Thanks for the support, I'll keep you posted, insha'Allah.

Hot&Cool...

Heres a pic of my hot and cool liquid lunch... yum, yum...

Latte with hand whipped cream sprinkled with cinnamon and vanilla slim fast shake also sprinkled with cinnamon...

No sugar added, I use sweetener...

Day Fourteen...

Today has been a bit different for me. I was pretty sick yesterday and had to change a few things with my diet. Today, I had to start with a solid plan instead of the usual liquids. I will continue with liquids from lunch onward, insha'Allah. Here is a picture of a nice salad that I made for my snack. I've really gotta take care of my body. Yesterday I was super sick :( 
My new goal is to concentrate on my portions... I have major problems with portion control and nibbling. This truly is a battle for me. I am planning a night out with my hubby for Friday night and I really want to earn it... so... back to the hard stuff insha'Allah. I'll update later insha'Allah...
Hey... where is everyone?? Anyone out there?

 

It's Raining :)

Yay! I love the rain and living here is Doha I don't get to see it very often. I am excited to be getting back on track, by the Mercy of Allah alone. I am planning to keep it liquid for a while and try to undo my mistakes from yesterday. I made a mistake but today is a new day, Alhamdulillah! The kids were so excited today to see the rain. They wanted to go out and play in it. They can't even imagine what it's like where I'm from. Hedaya, my oldest actually remembers the rain of Georgia. She was 3 when we moved here. Although, its only a weak memory at this point. I love the smell of the rain. I can often smell it coming even before it hits. Its like an old friend to me. I remember sitting out on my Mamas porch and reading a book while swinging in a hammock swing watching the rain, snuggled up with a blanket. Yes, I love the rain, masha'Allah how Allah nourishes the earth and brings life to the plants and all things. Yesterday we drove to Al-Khor which is usually a pretty boring drive from Doha through the boring dessert. However, it was very interesting, there are many grassy spots that have formed in the dessert. That is amazing to me, to see grass growing naturally in a place that was dusty dessert for the last 7 years. Allahu Akbar, Allah is the greatest! It's Amazing!
Anyway, I'm drinking my slim fast now, yum, yum...
I will update with my progress later, insha'Allah.

Day twelve...

Today was not good, as far as my diet goes... other than that, alhamdulillah, it was nice. We went to a friends house and ate wonderful food and enjoyed wonderful company. My diet kinda went out the window, and I am really beating myself up about it too. I feel like a failure. I've gotta start all over tomorrow. Please, anyone reading this, make dua'a for me to get it together tomorrow! The funny thing is that I didn't even feel comfortable eating that much, it just tasted good, but my belly wasn't happy. I feel really stupid when I eat like that. I wanted to taste everything, but some things were really tasty so I got more of them than I should have, then there was dessert... which was soooo yummy. Anyway, I blew it, and now I'm feeling like a total loser. I pray that Allah makes this trial easier. I really don't want to be like this for the rest of my life. It's a miserable state of mind and I can't wait to get over it. I don't like that I'm so weak when it comes to food. Well, I pray that tomorrow I will get back on track and that Allah will bless me with the ability to stick to my plan and with extra results...ahmeen.
I will update more tomorrow, insha'Allah...
Anyone out there reading????

Day eleven summary...

Well, today was very busy for me... I was busy all day long and wasn't able to update until now. I made a mistake today... I forgot to eat lunch. I know, that sounds crazy but it happened. That made me so hungry that when I ate dinner I ate more than I should have. Still, I'm pleased that I didn't overdo it. I would have eaten much more a few weeks ago, even without skipping lunch. Alhamdulillah, I'm getting the hang of it. Tonight we had guests and it was very nice, masha'Allah. I'm so busy... Even tomorrow(actually today its almost fajr time) I will be busy, we are going out, insha'Allah to visit our friends. I will try to hold it together. May Allah make it easy on me...ahmeen.

Oh yeah, it actually rained today... that kinda caught me off guard. Thunder and lightening too... I better enjoy it, It may be a long time before I see rain again.

Day ten...

It was a nice day today, Masha'Allah. I think that I did well today, much better than yesterday. I woke up not feeling so well though... I have migraines and today started like one of those days. Today was the warming up day so its possible that tomorrow will be a full blown migraine. Alhamdulillah, even with the nagging headache I stayed on my plan. I had a shake for breakfast, I had a banana shake for a snack (made with 1 cup of skim milk, one small banana, and some sweetener and ice) I had vegetable soup for lunch and a chicken sharwarma from my favorite sharwarma place for dinner along with a mixed salad plate which I shared with Haylah. That was delicious. It filled me up so much that I don't even have room for anything else. Oh yeah, except for the diet Pepsi that I got while I was out... for those of you who don't personally know me, I have had a love for diet Pepsi for ages and I used to drink one or two a day. I have since broken the habit and this is the first one I've had in a week... Thats pretty cool for me. Masha'Allah. I feel like I've made it through yet another trial with my weight. Each day is an accomplishment. May Allah give me many more good days and make the best of my days the day I meet Him, my Creator and the best of my deeds my last ones... ahmeen.

Still feelin' down...

It's after dinner and I'm still feeling down. I had a nice dinner, masha'Allah, but still, I'm feeling like I'm not doing as good as I should be. While I was cooking it was so hard trying to resist the temptation to nibble... and honestly, I gave in a bit. I would love some tips on how not to nibble while cooking. This is a big problem for me. I made myself drink a big cup of water before I ate my dinner hoping it would help me to eat less. I've just had a rough day, insha'Allah tomorrow will be better.

Hangin in there...

Today has been trying. It's day nine and I'm feeling like I might have messed up. I started out really good, masha'Allah. I had my shake for breakfast, although I had a cup a tea first... I found that starting my day with something icy and cold wasn't very pleasant. I worked out a bit later, as usual and everything was going fine. Here is where things start to get kinda mixed up... I was pretty happy when my hubby came home with fruit so I mixed up a shake with banana, strawberries, half a cup of skim milk and about a quarter cup of thick mango juice. It was delicious, masha'Allah... I later looked at a calorie counter and discovered that my shake had more calories than I had anticipated. It gets even more upsetting... at lunch time I heated up a bowl of soup... no problem there... but I added a slice of cheese to it and grabbed a few pretzels. I am concerned that I have fallen back into my old grabby self... I've gotta get it together. I need to set a plan as to whether I am allowing myself to have anything solid before dinner. I just feel like I've let myself down. It doesn't sound like much but it adds up and I've gotta get it under control before I lose track all together. I have a major fear of failure. I can't afford to fail this time. I need to get this weight off once and for all. I'm tired of my whole life being limited by my weight. I'm ready for a change. I've gotta pick myself up and try harder not to slip up. This isn't easy, but it's gotta be done. Please make dua'a for me, I really need it. May Allah grant me success and bless me with the ability to keep the weight off... ahmeen.

Just relaxing...

The day is over and I'm just relaxing now, masha'Allah. The day proved to be a bit more difficult than I thought it would be. I was nauseous, hungry and fighting my urges to nibble. Alhamdulillah, by the Mercy of Allah alone, I was able to resist the urge. When I was in the kitchen I kept looking in and out of cabinets and the fridge, looking for something... this is an old habit of mine. Alhamdulillah, I didn't grab anything. I made myself a milkshake... and I mean just skim milk, ice and a bit of sweetener... It was a nice snack alhamdulillah. I hope to get to the store sometime this week to pick up other ingredients like bananas, and vanilla, insha'Allah. For dinner I had a nice plate of chicken, rice and salad... I had a huge craving for french fries so I fried up a half a handful, in some sunflower oil... they were delicious. I seasoned them with some salt, chilly powder, and parsley flakes. Masha'Allah they were yummy! I didn't eat everything but I ate the fries, salad, most of the rice and half of the chicken. I had a bowl of soup for a snack and I drank tea and lots of water. I've done well today, Alhamdulillah, may Allah make tomorrow easier and more beneficial, and give me visible evidence of my weight loss...ahmeen... 

 

This is what I ate for dinner, masha'Allah it was yummy... notice my fries that I couldn't go without... they were delicious!!!

Day eight!

I can't believe that it is already day eight... although I know I've really been dealing with all the changes I'm making to my diet. It hasn't been easy but it's been worth it. I am starting to see some changes in my appearance, masha'Allah. Although it's only subtle things, it's still an improvement. My face is smoother and tighter. I'm glad of that. My belly isn't poking out as much. It's kinda like I'm melting. My overall shape hasn't really changed, I'm just shrinking. Hey, I ain't complaining!!! Masha'Allah!
I had my slimfast shake for breakfast again, I'm telling you... those things are very filling, masha'Allah! I almost couldn't finish. A bit after breakfast I did my exercise on the treadmill and now I'm exhausted! I had a cup of green tea, insha'Allah that caffeine will perk me up a bit :)
Alhamdulillah, I am feeling much better than yesterday. Last night I was very nauseous, even after I went to bed. I'm sure that will all pass with time, insha'Allah. No pain, no gain right...
I thank Allah, our Creator, first and then I thank all of you who took the time to comment and help me in my struggle...truly I have benefited from your comments. May Allah reward all of you...ahmeen.
Insha'Allah I will update later.